rhymes with "ouble enetration"
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize