I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
I feel great
I just peed on a car
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
This is classic penis vs brain.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Randomize
