she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Randomize