Christians are straight up FREAKS
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
