i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
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