so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
