she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
