Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize
