Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
the day after is always just damage control
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
