what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
