Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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