I heard we made out
We won't sleep together?
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
