i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
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