true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
