Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
