Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
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Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
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I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
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