hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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