The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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