He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Randomize
