The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
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