shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
My ATM looks so different sober.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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