she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Randomize
