Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
