I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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