woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Randomize
