The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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