I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Randomize
