We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
