Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
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