Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
