Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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