Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Randomize
