Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Randomize