She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
