I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
just tell him i said nine months
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
