He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Randomize
