he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Randomize
