What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize