I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
What did we do last night that was yellow?
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
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he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
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I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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