i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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