Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
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