Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
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