apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
This show inspires me to have sex in space
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize