A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
