How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
