I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize