question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
