I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
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