I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
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Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
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She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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