Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Randomize
