my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Randomize
